Sunday, December 20, 2009

Silent night

That's how it will be for many families this Christmas.

Only the sound of alarms, nurses talking, vents running, and doctors ordering, will fill the ears of many families this year. Its so loud, but its, so, so silent. (I cant believe how much Alex has changed since that video)

I remember those sounds very clearly. The sound of the oscillator shaking Alex's little body, the sound of the alarms when his o2 would drop to low, or his heart would beat too fast.

I remember listening to the nurses talking about what they would be doing when they got home that night, wishing so desperately that I could go home too.

I remember just being alone.

I was alone.

Being in the hospital with your sick child is a desperate place to be.

Don't wait for someone to ask you to come and visit them,

Don't assume they are surrounded.

Dont hope someone else is there.

Go visit someone in the hospital this Christmas, their nights are silent enough.


Anonymous said...

Dear Jessica,

I saw how vulnerable your other children were in your absence. I tried to cushion them and keep their lives as normal as possible at that time.
I am sorry I was unable to be with you too. I am sorry you felt abandoned and alone.

Thankful for Emmanuel-God is with us in noise and in silence.


Unknown said...


Your comment just made me cry... God always knows what people need to hear, even if it's through someone else's blog.


And Jessica - you are such a wonderful person. I am sorry you were alone during that time too - no one should be. But you are making a difference in people's lives by visiting and being a light of hope for families in the NICU. What you're doing may seem like a kind gesture, but for many, it's so much more than that. Thank you for being who you are, and I love you, too!


Angelica mom to JesusRTS said...

I have not found a hospital that will let me in to just visit and be with someone i dont know. do you know how i can get a pass or how i would be able to help out?

Anxious AF said...

Angelica, the NICU ALex was in lets me come and bring the ornaments,I dont go into the rooms, but stand at the doors of each room.

                               Four years, overn5,000 injections of insulin just to stay alive.